Bleh

Lately I have been feeling bleh.

A part of me knows why and another part of me really doesn't. I find myself continually wrestling with God about life. About stuff.

I think part of my frustration stems from the fact that just when I think I have closed the door on a chapter, it creaks open again. And like an inquisitive child I stick my head into the narrow opening to take another look inside. And for just a brief moment it is enjoyable. But then bleh sets in. And it lingers.

Bleh.

Why can't I find a lock and bolt for the door and make sure that it is shut for good? While I was cleaning my classroom today, Britt Nicole's song Have Your Way was playing. She sums up things better than I ever could.

Feels like i`ve been here forever,

Why can`t you just intervene?

Do you see the tears keep falling?

And i`m falling apart at the seams.

But you never said the road would be easy,

But you said that you would never leave.

And you never promised that this life wasn`t hard,

But you promised you`d take care of me.

So I`ll stop searching for the answers,

I`ll stop praying for an escape,

And I`ll trust you,God, with where i am,

And believe that you will have your way.

Just have your way.

Just have your way.

When my friends and my family have left me,

And I feel so ashamed and so cold.

Remind me that you take broken things

And turn them into beautiful.

So I`ll stop searching for the answers,

I`ll stop praying for an escape,

And i`ll trust you, God, with where i am,

And believe that you`ll have your way.

Just have your way.

Just have your way.

Even if my dreams have died,

And even if i don`t survive,

I`ll still worship you with all my life.

My life.

Whoa-oh..

And I`ll stop searching for the answers,

I`ll stop praying for an escape,

And i`ll trust you, God, with where i am,

And believe that you will have your way.

Just have your way.

Just have your way.

I know you will.

I won`t forget.

Whoa-oh

You love me.

Have your way.

Yeah